Monday, September 28, 2009
7:27am on monday, september 28th.
is it fascination or pure infatuation that's completely taken over my thought process? i can't get you out of my head. no matter how hard i try, every path i take leads directly back to you. your smile lights up my inner darkness and whisks me away to the place of pure childish excitement. i recall the feel of your skin against mine, oh the splendid ways we kissed. i held your hand and we danced into slumber for what felt like weeks at a time. my black cloud was simply a fashion accessory to perfect array of light you gave off, it only appeared when you were no where in clear sight. i've abandoned my only solace and exchanged my true love with my other true love. every song remind me of you. every waking minute brings your presence to the forefront. you were perfection in the simplest form. you were my beginning and my end. why must i float helplessly without your guidance? the sun's warmth isn't half as hot as when you de-robed and skin was the only thing between our bones. hearts pounding and beating uncontrollably, i wish this could last forever. i never want to be alone, unless it's with your memory. i'll be okay knowing that i had the chance and opportunity to at least try out my undying devotion on you and only you. photographs of your features bring me nothing but sorrow and emptiness but in the best way possible. i want to fight for your affection. you can call me when you want to call. i'll be waiting for you. i want to brush your hair away from your eyes and look deeply into your gaze and once again become speechless. beauty gets its definition from you. flawless in every single way. remember when you traced your fingers up my spine and we laughed about how we felt like we knew each other since childhood. i shared hidden things with you that no one will ever know about me. the one person who knows the most about me might not want to be in my life. the one person who can make and break me in one sentence has possibly forgotten me. there's words invented for times like these, sadly none are coming to mind. in mere seconds, i'll aim a gun at my head and shoot myself full of hope. here's hoping that when the time is right, the right will be right and wrong will be righted. cast only onto those who we push away, never harm the ones who are close. build up broken bridges but never places bridges over broken buildings. my automotive heart has learned to cruise in auto-pilot, will you take the wheel now? love, a character trait that's failed me again.